Nikki doesn’t want to hear another “umm” outta you!
How to Stop Saying “Umm” – A Step-by-Step Guide
You probably ended up here because you want to learn how to stop saying umm. And that’s fair enough! Nobody really enjoys a conversation filled with “umm” and “like.” It just feels… off. If you’re ready to kick these verbal tics, follow this guide to develop smoother, more confident speech. Instead of speaking on autopilot, focus on clarity and choose words deliberately. Everyday conversations are the best practice ground for building intentional speech. They’re the training ground for becoming a better public speaker!
Once you know when you use fillers, the rest is easy. Just follow this research-proven, step-by-step guide to stop saying umm for good.
1. Slow Down Your Pace To Stop Saying Umm
Filler words like ‘umm’ will often sneak in when you talk too fast. Slowing down gives your brain time to form complete thoughts. Imagine starting a conversation like writing an essay: pause before you make your first point.
Of course, this is easier said than done. But there are tangible and actionable ways to implement this in practice.
If you tend to rush, record yourself speaking and analyze when you stumble. The “mental spacebar” technique works wonders: just as you use spaces between words while typing, you can add pauses between thoughts when speaking.
🔦 UmmLike Tip: Speaking slower can make you sound more composed and more authoritative in any setting.
2. Pause for Thoughtfulness
Sometimes, silence is stronger than sound. When you want to stop saying umm, just pause instead of speaking immediately. This becomes even easier once you start speaking slower, like we suggested in step one.
Steven D. Cohen, a PhD Communications expert from Harvard, wrote about just how powerful a pause is to stop saying umm.
He described two ‘filler word hot spots’ in his work. He suggests imagining your thoughts and words out-loud as words written on paper.
The first hot spot would be the tab before the first paragraph, and the second hot spot would be the white space between the first and second paragraphs.
Take a deep breath through your nose to collect your thoughts when you hit these points during a speech. Many great speakers use subtle cues in these moments — like a glance away or a small hand gesture — to show they’re thinking, not struggling.
🔦 UmmLike Tip: A well-placed pause builds anticipation and makes your words land with more impact.
3. Embrace Silence To Stop Saying Like and Umm
Filler words happen when we’re uncomfortable with silence, but silence isn’t bad—it’s a sign of confidence. Yet, we tend to use more silence in professional speech compared to casual speech.
That’s why we use more filler words when we’re not paying attention, or just having a laid back conversation with a friend!
Research from Harvard proves if you can resist the urge to fill space, your speech will sound clearer and more intentional. You will also stop saying like (another hugely common filler word!) this way.
One way to put this into action is by planning for silence. Or, by even counting to three when you’re in a conversation before replying.
The key is to practice replacing filler words with purposeful pauses rather than rushing to fill gaps.
🔦 UmmLike Tip: Think of speaking like singing. Once you get used to the rhythm, the pauses feel natural instead of awkward. Also, you’d probably stop saying umm if you were singing!
4. You’ll Stop Saying Umm When You Expand Your Vocabulary
Many people say “um” because they’re searching for the right word. Strengthening your vocabulary makes it easier to express yourself smoothly. Just look at this list of common filler words from Cambridge University. They take up so much of our precious speaking time!
Reading regularly exposes you to new ways of phrasing thoughts, while word games and synonym lists help sharpen quick word recall.
If you often find yourself using the same fillers, experiment with alternative phrases that feel natural. This can be as easy as noticing the expressions that you’re drawn to in your favourite movies or TV shows.
🔦 UmmLike Tip: The more words you know, the less likely you’ll be stuck grasping for one mid-sentence.
5. Engage in Active Listening To Stop Saying Umm
Being fully present in a conversation helps you speak more smoothly. Now, this is something that is especially challenging in a digital world.
Mindfulness, breathing, yoga, and meditation are all ways to be a better listener.
When you focus on what the other person is saying instead of planning your response, your speech becomes more natural and fluid. Repeating key ideas mentally helps reinforce your understanding and reduces the urge to use fillers.
Paying attention to how great speakers talk can also reveal strategies for filler-free speech. We have plenty of examples of that on our Instagram page.
🔦 UmmLike Tip: When you’re actively listening, you’re less likely to “umm” while figuring out what to say next. UmmLike does this for you, right in the app!
6. How to Stop Saying Umm? Rehearse Communication Scenarios
With all of these tactics in mind, ultimately, the best way to get rid of fillers is through consistent practice. Start thinking outloud — even if it feels awkward at first.
You can also ask a friend to become your accountability buddy, pointing out whenever you use certain filler words.
Above all, recording yourself is one of the most effective techniques. Simulating real-life situations, such as job interviews or public speaking, helps you build confidence in speaking without relying on crutch words.
That’s because these scenarios allow you to pinpoint your personal problem areas and track your improvements. It’s the research-backed, proven way to decrease your filler words.
🔦 UmmLike Tip: The more comfortable you become with speaking, the less you’ll rely on fillers to get through sentences.
Expert Insights
You don’t need to stop saying ‘umm’ and ‘like’ altogether. There is an opportunity for context-specific usage.
“There’s a certain time and place for it, because of the impression that it makes on other people… You should learn how to speak without them for public speaking, but they do have a place in natural dialogue.” – Dr. Jean E. Fox Tree, UC Santa Cruz
You also might find that speaking with more confidence, and louder, will help your filler word usage.
“People who speak slowly often use more pauses than people who speak quickly. It is also interesting to know that when people speak, up to 50% of their speaking time may be made up by pauses.” Dr. Christian Gandeza
Frequently Asked Questions
Q: How long does it take to stop saying “umm”?
A: With consistent practice, most people see significant improvement within 7 days of using the UmmLike app, daily. Complete habit change typically takes 2 to 3 months.
Q: Should I eliminate ALL filler words?
A: No, some filler words in casual conversation can make speech more natural. The goal is to reduce them in professional settings and when they impede clarity.
Q: What if I’m naturally nervous?
A: That’s totally okay, and it’s normal! Combine these techniques with anxiety management strategies like deep breathing, preparation, and positive visualization. Be kind to yourself, and give yourself time to improve. It won’t happen overnight – but as with most things in life, big changes take time.
That’s a Wrap!
Dropping “umm” from your vocabulary isn’t about sounding robotic — it’s about speaking with intention. Slow down. Let pauses do the work. Be mindful of your words. With practice, you’ll own every conversation, speak with clarity, and finally say goodbye to filler words!
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